Do you ever worry "what if they leave me?"

In early 2022, The Depression Project posed a question to our 3,000,000+ person social media community:

What are the most common “what if ... ?” worrying thoughts that you experience?

Thousands of people responded, and one of the most common worrying thoughts people mentioned was:

“What if they leave me?"

Unfortunately, this can indeed be a very common worrying thought for people with a fear of abandonment, generalised anxiety disorder and/or another mental health issue to experience, and it’s one that can, among other things:

• Cause you to feel unsafe and on edge in your interpersonal relationships;
• Cause you to, in one way or another, push other people away out of fear of being hurt – which can result in you ending up alone and feeling devastated and heartbroken;
• Cause you to go along with everything that someone else wants because you fear that if you don’t, they will leave you – which can result in you not getting your own needs and wants met;
• Cause you to tolerate behaviour that bothers-, upsets- and hurts you because you fear that if you don’t, that that person will leave you;
• Cause you to hide your true self because you feel that if people knew the “real you”, that they may leave you – which can result in you feeling misunderstood;
• Cause you to avoid intimate relationships all together, because you worry that anyone you get close with may leave you just like other people have in the past, and then once again, you’ll end up shattered.

And, because the worrying thought “what if they leave me?” can have a destructive impact on your life like so, we’ve created this journal, in order to:

• Help you understand where this worrying thought originates from, as well as what the triggers and behavioural patterns are that continue to fuel it;
• Help you to let go of this worrying thought – so that you can feel safer and more secure in your interpersonal relationships, and feel much less inclined to engage in the behaviours that we just mentioned which can end up harming you.

Here’s A Breakdown Of Exactly What This Journal Will Cover

PART 1: Understanding What Fuels Your Worrying Thought "What If They Leave Me?"

The first step in being able to let go of the worrying thought “what if they leave me?” is to understand:

1. Where this worrying thought originates from;
2. What fuels and compounds this worrying thought over time.

The reason why understanding this is the first step in learning how to quieten and effectively cope with this worrying thought is because once you’re aware of where it originates from and what fuels and compounds it – i.e. the “fear of abandonment cycle” that's displayed below – then rather than unknowingly fuelling this cycle, you can start taking steps to instead break out of it.

So, in the first part of this journal, we're going to explain this "fear of abandonment cycle" in detail. Additionally, we'll also share a variety of journal prompts with you in order to help you think about and pinpoint what this "fear of abandonment cycle" looks like for you.

PART 2: Overcoming The Negative Core Beliefs That Fuel The "Fear Of Abandonment Cycle"

As we explain in detail in Part 1 of this journal, the "fear of abandonment cycle" begins with negative core beliefs (that stem from one or more difficult, painful experiences). Consequently, in order to break out of this cycle and free yourself from the worrying thought "what if they leave me?", two important steps to take are to:

1. Let go of the negative core beliefs you have which contribute to your fear of abandonment;
2. Replace them with healthier, more positive core beliefs that will result in you feeling more safe and secure.

For this reason, in Part 2 of this journal, we'll hold your hand through a variety of tried, tested, cognitive behavioural therapy-based journal exercises to help you achieve this objective. 

PART 3: Quietening And Effectively Coping With The Worrying Thought "What If They Leave Me?"

If you're able to replace your negative core belief(s) which fuel the “fear of abandonment cycle” with more accurate, positive and healthier core beliefs, then:

• It’s going to contribute to you feeling safer and more secure in your relationships;
• It’s going to slow the “fear of abandonment cycle”, quieten the worrying thought “what if they leave me?”, and make this worrying thought much easier to dismiss and let go of.

And, to keep the momentum going, in Part 3 of this journal, we’re going to share with you a variety of cognitive behavioural therapy strategies you can implement anytime you find yourself worrying “what if they leave me?”, in order to help you:

• Further quieten this worrying thought, and make it easier still to dismiss and let go of;
• Prevent yourself from reacting in ways that fuel the “fear of abandonment cycle”;
• Feel even safer and more secure in your relationships.

Additionally, we'll also share a variety of journal prompts for you to write out your response to - each of which are designed to help you implement the strategies that we'll share with you as effectively as possible.

FAQ #1: Why should I be confident this journal will help me?

This journal is grounded in cognitive behavioural therapy - which in case you don't know, is a leading form of treatment for anxiety, panic attacks, phobias, depression, personality disorders, and a wide range of other mental health issues.

Additionally, this journal is also written with the warmth, care, encouragement and insight that, with 3,000,000+ followers on social media, The Depression Project has become renowned for :)

FAQ #2: What format does this journal come in?

This journal is available in two different formats for you to choose from:

1. PDF - which you will be able to download instantly after purchase, and then print out at your home, office or local printer.
2. Paperback (if you live in the US or UK) - which will be delivered to you within 4-8 business days. Shipping costs are $7.95 within the US, and $9.95 within the UK. This shipping cost is a flat rate, so whether you order one journal, or multiple journals, the shipping cost will be the same (if you would like to, you'll find the option to add one or more other journals to your cart below so that you can save on shipping). Once your order has been shipped, you will be emailed a number so that you can track it.

FAQ #3: What if I give this journal a try but I don't like it?

We're extremely, extremely confident that you're going to find this journal immensely helpful. But, just in case you don't, the PDF version of this journal comes with a 60 Day, No-Questions-Asked, 100% Moneyback Guarantee!

If you have any questions about this journal, then please feel free to click here and contact us so that someone from our friendly team can answer them for you :)

Otherwise, we hope you choose to get this journal, because we know that you're going to find it really, really helpful!

All our love,

The Depression Project Team.